Hmm, that's a good point. There's a difference between one's *behavior* and one's *identity*. And I did not make or handle that distinction in this piece! I suppose the point where choice becomes relevant is at the moment of embracing or dismissing a concept of one's identity. Oh, and also coming out or keeping it to one's self privately. In my own life there was a lot of ambivalence, not so much about whether to run from it or go with it, but more about whether to trust that yes, this really *did* make sense versus holding these notions in abeyance and question them for awhile longer.