Looking at this with a new mind, it stirs a lot more interest in me than did the nonfiction version, even with a new mind. Curiously enough, with a new mind, the bit about the psychiatric hospital seems beyond credibility, even though I knew it was true before putting on the new mind, and even though I know inappropriate hospitalizations were commonplace in that era. I can't predict whether that'll be a problem; but problem or no, it's a necessary part of the story.

The phrase "be friend with" needs an s at the end of friend, or some similar fix. I think part 5 of the synopsys would benefit from a few more commas.